Personal game dev journay - A realization

If anyone is expecting anything here, i apologize. As far as promises concern, i know plan to continuously update the progress of the development for Project Roommate, but in reality not much is being kept for word. Updates are slow or non-existent because i've been putting thee project off for days, turn to weeks, and months.

Tbh, i'm being greedy and took too much on the plate for the fact i can't handle it, for a multitude of reasons. Mostly stems from my current state of mind (i believe) and the fact that i simply do not have the capabilities to juggle between my personal webcomic, two planned webcomic series (TBA), a planned upcoming Youtube channel (TBA), and now, this.

Starting with so many project ideas, but ending up not continuing it really hits my depressive episode, hard. I guess is the thrill of starting a project that led me to start a new one it one after another. Nothing wrong with starting a new one or abandon old ideas that isn't worth the time, but in my case, not finishing the initial project commenced is the BIG red flag here.

Second reason that (i guess) correlates to the matter is that i cant really make a head or tail out of the current project i'm working with. What is the direction of the story to be like? Gameplay-based or story-driven? Personally i liked to have both, but again, due to limited skills i currently have i guess this isn't probable and i hate to part with the idea of including all.

Third, i guess is part of my laziness during my depressive episode. Games (like ACNH, Fall Guys, Among Us, Genshin Impact, and other titles) and VTuber phases helped me go through my existential crisis and insanity instances.

To combat all these problems i guess i have to drop the project entirely if what i can produce isn't going to satisfy me. In other words, Project Roommate is to be shelved for now. Instead, imma create clones of exiting titles just for practice's sake. I always forgot that game developing is a skill to hone and inevitably requires practice to get accustomed to and to 'git gud' at it. I always got side-tracked that my game to be published must be good A-tier. Not only that, but aiming for my first ever completed game to be published, which is kinda impossible to achieve. (For context, i rarely have a finished game, let alone a published one, which explains alot)

Fail faster.

That's all for update to date.

First post :v

Hey all, first post here. Let me first introduce myself.

I'm a guy who graduated with a degree majoring Game Development. Being the child with a stereotypical Asian upbringing... let's just say society from where i came from has a rather shallow opinion on my decision. 

Jk jk. My parents, although reluctant at first, they are quite supportive of my decision then. 

Love you ma and pa.

Over the years, despite still having the stigma of being an artist isn't a real job in the older generation, i'm kinda glad that by today's standards the thought of having creative jobs have shifted. But then, for me to work as a graphic designer for 10 months, then jump ship to become a mainstream game developer the last 9 months, i can safely say... this isn't what i want at all. Passion aside, working as an artist or a game programmer work some company is really no different from a conventional 9-5 job. 

Then i thought of a rather crazy idea. Why not i make my own stuff? Why not i become an entrepreneur? 

Yikes and double yikes. 

I had this idea of working for myself the moment i've graduated university. A pretty bold statement for some freshie who know nothing about the world. Luckily my friends and family stopped me to pursue it in the name self-doubt. The turmoil of being unemployed for 6 months took a toll on me. And i am forever grateful to them for that.

Although that being said, after a year and a half in with two job experiences, that feeling of wanting to work for myself crept back in. Being an entrepreneur is still a rather bold statement, especially with the global pandemic going on these few months. But i feel that i'm much ready now... mentally, of course. With this setup, i hope i can work out something akin to my liking yet creating something that can resonate with the masses. Or at least, to the people who supports me and likes my stuff.

To be honest, i have much doubts, no prior experience of doing 'real' game dev, and my track record of actually complete a project or seeing things through were undoubtedly, questionable. I hope opening up this blog helps me resolve that problem. There isn't much stuff to show now, but i promise to make it at least something worth indulging.

So... expect an update at least once a month. For the next update i'll be posting the specifics of a game idea i have in mind about my OCs. More of a life sim than anything else. Sounds boring compared to the past works (if you guys interested there is a link below), but eh. It's something i'm looking forward to work on next to my web-comic about my OCs _(:3/

Hope i can make money out of this. Heh.

Until next time my doods and gals.

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Shameless plug, link to my past works here.

Jargon:

jk = joking

game dev = game developer

OCs = Original Characters

life sim = life simulator (games like Sims4, Animal Crossing... you name it.)